DID and Night Lights

I appear to be in my late twenties, but there are many of us aged twelve and under. As someone in their late twenties, I’m not scared of the dark. I sleep best in a completely dark room, and fall asleep to the radio, an audiobook, or meditation. When I wake up during the night I reach over for my phone to check the time, then turn on the radio, or my audiobook again (both have sleep timers).

It’s 100% different if younger parts are out, or nearby, at night time. There is fear, anxiety, and panic. Miss 7 needs to be able to see the door so she can be prepared should anyone (past perpetrators) open it. Others become disorientated and confused when they’re in the dark and forget where we are. Without being able to see the room all they know is that they’re in a bed, and being in bed, in the dark, means ‘bad things’ are going to happen.

Last night we fell asleep with our bedroom door open, and the dining room light on. It meant that younger parts, including Miss 7, were able to relax enough to sleep.

This was our view from bed:

Dark_scared_of_dark_ptsd_cptsd_post_traumatic_stress_disorder_dissociation_DID_Dissociative_Identity_Disorder

Several week ago we also purchased a night light. It was something I hadn’t wanted to do because I feared what friends might think if they knew I, an adult, had a night light. I didn’t want something so ‘babyish’ in my bedroom. Eventually I decided upon a white ceramic cat LED night light.

Dark_scared_of_dark_ptsd_cptsd_post_traumatic_stress_disorder_dissociation_DID_Dissociative_Identity_Disorder_night_light

How helpful the night light is depends on who’s our, or nearby. For Miss 7 it’s absolutely not bright enough. She can’t see the bedroom door even with the night light on. For other parts it’s enough to be able to see it, and remember where they are, and that they’re safe now.

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4 thoughts on “DID and Night Lights

  1. I can relate to this. I have an overhead light, a regular lamp, a low-light lamp, and a battery-powered candle that emit different levels of light. Which one is left on for sleep depends on who’s near the front and who’s struggling with nighttime fears. Love the cat!

    • I think we may need to do something similar to you – lots of different light options. Our psychologist suggested putting glow in the dark stickers (or plastic shapes) on the back of the door. That’s something we’ll be looking into next.

  2. Pingback: Mini Flashbacks | Life as a Committee

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